What is BDSM

What is BDSM? BDSM is form erotic practice that involves role- play, dominance and submission. Dramas and movies have shaped public perception of BDSM to be a form of fetish or even psychological disorder, yet involving mild and safe degree of BDSM in sex spices up processes and is perfectly normal. In fact, surveys have shown astonishing evidence that majority of woman gets aroused by BDSM acts in some form or other. No doubt it subsequently became a popular psychological research topic. Albeit little, accidents during extreme BDSM plays are not unheard of. It is hence of paramount importance that couples respect each other’s body and treat BDSM process only as much as a game.

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Definitions

Let’s begin by looking at their definitions. Definitions are varied but mainly revolves around these few subjects.

B- Bondage

D- Discipline, Domination

S- Submission, Sadism

M- Masochism

B&D – Bondage & Discipline

S&M – Sadism and Masochism or Sadomasochism

Roles- Different forms and different degree of BDSM practices exist, but what characterises BDSM practice is the unbalance in power during the process. The party who exerts control over the other is referred to as “the tops” (or sometimes “dominant”) while the latter is referred to as “the bottoms” (or sometimes “submissive”). Yet it’s not just that simple, there are instances when the tops would follow preferences of the bottoms, taking instructions from them. Such tops were then given adjectives such as “service tops” or “pleasing tops”.

Safety

A safety word

Safe words are used in BDSM play to ensure the tops know when the bottoms wants him/her to stop. Do note, however, that words such as “no”, “stop”, “ouch”, no matter the magnitude of loudness, are in no way good words to use as safe words. They are simply too common used during sex that the tops would have no idea when it’s the real stop.

Words such as “Green”, “Yellow”, “Red”, which typically do not appear in sex, are good safe words and are commonly used in BDSM play to signal a stop to the process.

Where to find the BDSM equipment 

There are many BDSM communities around in the world. BDSM displays and sale of equipment such as German Fetish Ball are common. Singapore sex stories writing community about BDSM stories liken to 50 shades of grey can also be easily found. Certainly, sex toys shops would also offer a wide and variety of such BDSM toys.