How to Help Someone with Trauma

Enduring traumatic events can impact our daily lives and those of people around us. Trauma hampers an individual's ability to think logically and intensifies the brain's fear and stress responses. Witnessing, hearing, or even smelling something can prompt the brain to link it to a previous traumatic incident. This could trigger a person to react with fight or flight responses, leading to sudden panic attacks, extreme fear, or complete breakdowns.

Observing a loved one undergo this can be distressing. You might feel overwhelmed and influenced by the challenging situations they have faced and their coping mechanisms. Individuals enduring persistent trauma require the love and support of others during their recovery process. There is always optimism in the lengthy path to healing from trauma. Here is how you can help someone with trauma.

Do Not Judge

Understanding why individuals struggle to 'move on' from trauma can be challenging, especially if you haven't experienced trauma yourself or perceive shared experiences differently. It's natural to hope for improvement, but it's crucial not to blame or pressure them to recover quickly without the necessary time and support.

Avoid judging those whose reactions to trauma may differ from your expectations, as everyone responds uniquely to such experiences. Do not assume that individuals require specific types of support or professional assistance and do not interpret their response as a lack of acknowledgment of the trauma's impact.

Support Treatment

Many individuals who have experienced trauma require professional PTSD therapy. However, broaching this subject can be delicate. Consider how you would react if therapy were suggested to you.

Choose an appropriate moment to address your concerns. Avoid discussing it during conflicts or crises. Additionally, mind your choice of words. Avoid language that suggests your loved one is "crazy." Present it positively and practically: treatment offers an opportunity to acquire new skills for managing various challenges associated with PTSD. Options like ketamine therapy and EMDR have shown promising results in treating PTSD.

Provide Practical Assistance

Following a traumatic event, practical support may be required as trauma can affect our clarity of thought and organization. Activities such as cooking or cleaning can be beneficial. However, ensuring that the individual being assisted retains control and a voice in their environment is crucial. Avoid taking over.

Feeling concerned for someone may lead to a desire to assist them in improving their situation or feeling frustrated if they disagree. Traumatic events often involve feelings of powerlessness or loss of control. Pressuring or dictating actions to them could exacerbate their sense of powerlessness. Instead, aim to motivate and support them to make their own decisions.

Honor their Privacy

Avoid disclosing their experiences without their consent. For instance, they may prefer not to have you share what they've been through with mutual friends or family. They might also choose not to talk about their ordeal with you, even if you're close, so don't take it personally. Offer reassurance that you're available when they need support. Remember, seeking help doesn't imply keeping everything to yourself.

Practice Attentive Listening

Avoid compelling someone with PTSD to talk, but if they choose to share, listen without expectations or judgments. Show interest and care without feeling the need to give advice. Simply listening attentively is more beneficial than words.

Individuals with PTSD may discuss their traumatic experiences repeatedly. This is part of the healing process. Resist the urge to stop them and instead offer your support by being there to listen as many times as needed.

Some details shared by your loved one may be distressing. It's acceptable to find hearing difficult, but it's important to honor their emotions and responses. They may hesitate to confide in you again if you appear disapproving or judgmental.

Endnote

Reframing and reassessing traumatic experiences with a trusted mental health professional can assist a loved one in navigating their trauma and reclaiming command over intrusive thoughts and feelings linked to their past experiences.