Chapter 5: Dealing withPEOPLE
Engaging with journalists, connecting with clients, forging bonds with stakeholders, and navigating diverse opinions – all while collaborating closely with your team – are at the heart of PR and communications. These dynamic interactions are what make the profession so exciting and rewarding, but let’s face it: they can also be incredibly demanding. So, how can dealing with people be less challenging and exhausting?
We see ourselves as people-persons
It’s clear that Nordic PR and communication professionals value and thrive on connection and collaboration. Most can be defined as “people persons”: Half (52%) say they’re extroverts compared to one in three (32%) who define themselves as introverts, and six in ten (60%) define themselves as team players compared to three in ten (30%) who identify as lone wolfs. Further, six in ten say “dealing with people” is one of the most interesting aspects of their work. Looking ahead, many believe their social skills will outshine technical abilities in importance over the next five years, solidifying the value we place in the human connection of the profession.
The quest for authenticity: Are we getting in our own way?
While Nordic PR and communications professionals value the social side of work, genuine connections seem harder to come by. Over half admit that building authentic relationships with journalists and clients is becoming increasingly difficult.
Ironically, while craving authenticity, many create barriers to it. More than half say they present a "work persona" which is different from their true selves, while only one in five (22%) say they don’t have one. The way we communicate adds another layer of distance. A majority prefer digital over face-to-face interactions, and nearly half shy away from phone calls.
Small-talking sickness?
While the social aspect of work is what makes our job interesting, it can also take a toll. More than half say that people-related aspects of their work have a large negative impact on their mental wellbeing. And it’s not just the big-ticket challenges like navigating conflicts or teamwork dynamics that we find challenging. For many, even the simple act of small talk or reaching out to initiate contact can feel just as daunting and draining.
NEXT GEN PRO PERSPECTIVEThe social pressure is on – no network, no job?
While the PR students describe themselves as extroverts, drawn to the industry’s relational nature, the pressure to network can feel overwhelming as well as inauthentic. But in a highly competitive field, networking is seen as more or less essential for breaking into the business.
“I'm a social person, but the whole 'obvious networking' thing isn't my vibe. Coming from a smaller town, I haven’t had the chance to build a natural network here, and it feels like I’m already starting at a disadvantage when it comes to breaking into the industry.
THE EXPERTS’ ADVICEMaking social situations less daunting and draining
As with the other areas, it’s clear that Nordic PR and communications professionals have a love-hate relationship with the social aspects of work. While relationships make the job dynamic and meaningful, many still find socializing – especially in-person – draining and daunting. So how can we ease the pressure and make interactions more enjoyable? We turned to emotional intelligence expert Sylvia Baffour and personality researcher Petri Kajonius for some practical and refreshing advice.
“Instead of fearing the weirdness and friction, lean into it – it’s what creates genuine connections and sets you apart from a robot.
Emotional intelligence expert Syliva Baffour: “Embrace the messiness of human interactions”
The reason socializing can feel exhausting, Sylvia explains, is because we set impossibly high standards for ourselves as well as for others. When the reality of an interaction doesn’t match our ideals, it feels like failure. Her solution? Embrace the awkwardness. - Interacting with people is vulnerable for everyone, but especially in communications, where relationships are at the heart of the job. Instead of fearing the weirdness and friction, lean into it – it’s what creates genuine connections and sets you apart from a robot.
Sylvia’s remedy for small talk anxiety: Focus on the “aftertaste”
Small talk often gets a bad reputation for being draining, but Sylvia suggests that’s because we focus too much on ourselves.- If you’re dreading small talk at a meeting or work event, it’s probably because you’re stuck in a “me, me, me” mindset. Shift your focus to the other person and to creating a positive “aftertaste” of your interaction: “What’s one positive feeling I want them to leave with after our conversation?” This shift transforms interactions into something creative and energizing, almost like a chess game.
Sylvia’s advice on navigating conflicts: Normalize differing viewpoints
While conflict is often seen as something to avoid, Sylvia stresses it’s a natural and valuable part of collaboration.
- Conflict isn’t inherently good or bad – it’s just a signal that perspectives differ. Instead of fearing it, learn to manage it constructively.
Here’s her three-step approach to healthy conflict resolution:
1. Normalize differing viewpoints: Remind yourself of, and accept that, disagreements are natural. This helps to prevent them from becoming personal.
2. Listen with empathy: When in disagreement, focus on understanding the other person’s motivations and perspectives rather than trying to get your point through or convince the other. Find common ground to build on.
3. Keep emotions in check: Conflict can trigger big feelings. Remember it’s okay to take a moment to gain perspective before responding. Pause, reflect, and set an intention to stay calm and professional.
Personality researcher Petri Kajonius: “Practice radical genuineness”
Professor and researcher Petri Kajonius isn’t surprised that many find the social side of work exhausting, especially since so many of us adopt a “work persona”:
- This constant effort to conform to expectations drains our energy and holds us back from forming authentic connections. By practicing radical genuineness, striving towards our comfort of authenticity, we free up energy to be more productive and build stronger, more meaningful relationships.
Radical genuineness in practice: How to small talk and initiate contact in a more real way
Small talk and reaching out can feel exhausting – especially if you’re faking it. Petri’s advice? Drop the act and turn up your authenticity. Here are three examples of ways to think and act to make it happen:
• Adopt a connection-oriented mindset: Even when meeting someone for the first time, enter the conversation with the intention to bring your real self to the table, and aim to leave it with some kind of genuine connection established.
• Test your honesty: Push your comfort zone by being more real than usual. Notice how others respond – and how great it feels to connect authentically. The more genuine you are, the more fulfilling your interactions become.
• Show a bit of you: Some more concrete ways to be more real are to share a short story about your day, mention how you’re really feeling, or slip in a quirky word from your dialect.
Do you find small talking and initiating contact dreadful and shallow? Click here to get the experts’ advice on how to make interactions less painful and more genuine.
Key takeaways: Dealing with
People
Social animals, building social walls
While valuing the social side of work and craving authenticity, many professionals create barriers to genuine connection: Around half use a "work persona," favor digital communication over face-to-face, and avoid phone calls.
Interacting is taking a toll
While social aspects of work are often seen as what makes our job interesting, many human interactions have a negative impact on our wellbeing – ranging from navigating conflicts to the seemingly simple tasks of small talk and reaching out.
How to deal with it:
To make socializing less draining and daunting, the experts advocate embracing rather than shying away from social awkwardness and friction and daring to be more genuine in our interactions.